Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Flying Monkeys -- Oh My! (TM)
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Winning

Narcissistic thinkers only believe they are winning if and when someone else is losing. Lacking the emotional intelligence to understand that collaborating for mutual social and physical success of mutual parties produces a superior human experience, they take great pleasure in thinking of their preferred scapegoats and targets as “Losers”.

Cluster B people love to tell everyone that in the “real world” humans strive to compete. They will gaslight people they are trying to recruit as conformists and enablers about the nature of success and winning compulsively.

If you have been told that in order to win you must abuse or that someone else must lose, congratulations. You have identified whoever lied to you and foisted that bit of toxic NLP off on you as — more than likely — a vertical thinker.

If a vertical thinker is confronted with a social scenario where they are asked to do the right thing versus something to self-promote, they will wait until they think no one of consequence is looking. Then and typically only then will they strive to be sneaky — choosing to situationally abuse for their own personal advancement or pleasure at the expense of others, typically followed by a denial that they even did it when and if they are caught red-handed.

If someone leaves a purse with a wallet on a bench, for instance, the vertical thinker might steal the wallet and leave the handbag, walk away with the purse as if it was theirs all along, and or they might check the wallet for cash followed by helping themselves to some before placing the item back in the sack.

A horizontal thinker is likely to view a person who is egocentric, narcissistic, and willing to self-promote at the expense of others as a morally inept, low-level thinker. The person who sees the broader picture is likely to think about all the reasons why it would be best to return the purse with the wallet as well as the cash intact, peeking inside to see if they can identify the owner and be likely to self-appoint themselves in a guardian role to protect the lost-and-found object collection until such a time the bag can be left with authorities or returned to the original owner.

A Cluster B person is likely to view the acts of the horizontal thinker as stupid, foolish, naive, and proof positive the honest person is what they refer to as being like a sheep. The honest person who strives to do the right thing is loathed, ridiculed, and thought of as a social misfit surely to go down in narcy anti-social karmic history as nothing short of a blathering idiot for failing to capitalize on someone else’s mistake or accidental misfortune.

Seeing the honest person who returned the bag thinking about what they would feel like if they had lost their own as a LOSER and the thief a WINNER, the vertical thinker is likely to cheer and laugh when the covert situational abuser self-promotes at the expense of others. This is the role model toxic parents set for children — yelling things like “too bad, so sad… they shouldn’t have left it” to justify their support of the choice to be anti-social.

Nurturing Cluster B ethics at home, parents who encourage their children to compete for their affections promote what is known as sibling rivalry — first. As a child ages and their social circle expands, the abusive parent — striving to nurture pack behavior and toxic values in their young — will then move on to cultivating in the child a spirit of social aggression that helps fuel rage and envy while creating the illusion that people outside of the family unit are only interested in fostering a communal sense of social competition.

Having been taught to vie for the human affection and approval of their toxic caregivers by out-thinking or out-physically performing their sibling rivals, youngsters from toxic family units tend to approach all social scenarios as if they are either on the hunt or behaving in ways that indicate their belief that if they do not harm others first that it will threaten their social and physical chance at survival.

Sadly, when groups of people in family units are trained to behave in such ways, the psychopathology of humans raised believing gaslighting assertions shifts the actual neurological structure. Showing depleted empathy reactions on brain scans, scientists and psychologists have been able to show that people who have been exposed to witnessing or enduring repeated trauma do not display neurotypical responses to social stimuli that reflect anything in the range of a healthy norm.

The more narcissistic a person, the more egocentric. The more anti-social, the less neurological capacity they have for caring.

When a child is praised for bad behavior, is taught to brutalize others while seeking reward, and they are not given proper social and emotional training as youngsters, they tend to feel profoundly out of sorts for a lifetime. Lacking the ability to self-soothe and having limited to no ability to process complex emotions with any meaningful self-reflection, they tend to be impulsive, chronically in need of adrenal stimulation to alleviate pervasive existential boredom, and they have no feeling of connection to most other humans.

Lacking a feeling of being part of the all, they seek to create hierarchical structures. The theory that Cluster B people are greater by nature as well as by nurture than others is wholly reflective of vertical thinkers having the power to socially influence world cultures.

By gaslighting about the true meaning of words like SUCCESS and WINNING, conflating the nature of the terms and striving to make the Platonic form of their word choices match their own demented and grandiose self-concept, the Cluster B people and vertical thinkers who enable lock themselves socially into a pattern of thinking that matches Thomas Hobbes account of human nature.

Hobbes believed that a top-down monarchy with an absolute ruler — immoral or not — was the best form of government to oversee what he would likely to have said were a bunch of snowflakes, sheep, and losers had he been writing in the 21st century. His summation of the world was that life was nasty, solitary, poor, brutish, and short — his personal life experience witnessing trauma and Narcissistic Abuse having greatly impacted the formation of his of likely Cluster B personality type, noting his forensic psychology shows signs of trauma exposure from his earliest youth.

Hobbes put forward a social and political philosophical treatise known as “The Leviathan” back when monarchs ruled the world like despots. He claimed that the Leviathan — the monster, the absolute ruler, the monarch as an absolute authority figure — was a necessary evil needed to control the general population; he viewed their proclamations of law or fickle decisions while ruling (good or bad) as an end point on a metaphoric line segment, creating a moral as well as legal definition line.

In Hobbes’ mind, the people under a monarch were greater or lesser human beings according to wealth, status, and power. Those at the bottom rung of society’s ladder were his version of a Loser, while people who clawed their way to the top, brutalizing others at whim or with intent Machiavellian purpose, were Winners.

Needless to say, Hobbes — as one of the world’s most respected Philosophers — had a point. In a society dominated by Cluster B people, life would — for all underlings — be a social experience for the masses that would be functional but arguably cause the eventual extinction of all society’s members from the top down.

That’s the fatal flaw in following the belief systems and code of social conduct engaged in by neurologically damaged, Cluster B thinkers — anyone who does is likely to suffer depleted health function and misery throughout their life, to die young or in a violent way, and or to eventually starve to death. That’s Charles Darwin’s ultimate measurement of social decay leading to mass extinction of a species that eats its own young and defiles its own nest, not winning from a scientific or evolutionary standpoint.

As such, before buying into the gaslighting assertion of Cluster B thinkers and their toxic enablers that humans live in a dog-eat-dog world. No earthly success of the human species was ever accomplished by a Solitary Walker.

Look to Rousseau’s definition of the Noble Savage to understand what life has the potential to be like when and if Cluster B people are limited in their sphere of social influence and properly socialized by the larger community. Jean-Jacques might have been a Traumatized Empath who made many narcissistic decisions that resembled anti-social thinking styles, but he was onto something big when he refuted Thomas Hobbes vertical thinking assertion.

In a Rousseauvian schema, the noble savages who work to collaborate and trade for goods are likely to help improve lifestyle and living conditions not simply for themselves but en masse eventually for all other humans. Following a social strata that allows unique skill sets to develop that are valued for how they benefit society at large (rather than for being valued as a competitive force), the true winners in society are those who use personal talent to benefit themselves as much or more so as they do for others without feeling the need to compete or to brutalize.

A winner in a Rousseauvian society is happy, healthy, able to self-reflect, values social opportunities to interact with as well as to learn from others, and is prone to fostering relationships with people who have skill sets that vary. Unlikely to seek to run in a pack of people who all like the same things as well as who have the same skills or culture of origin, the horizontal thinker meets strangers and strives to observe and broker a peaceful exchange of goods, time-sharing, or information.

The vertical thinker, when meeting a stranger, tends to have a xenophobic response fostered by toxic family members and peers who are emotionally and/or psychologically handicapped by nature or nurture. They see a new land mass, for instance, and immediate think of the wealth they can self-generate if they kill the strangers and rob the land mass of anything they personally feel might be something they want, something they feel like destroying for fun, or that is valuable.

Think of White Culture looking at the natives of Africa. Then realize how vertical thinkers, many with Cluster B personality types, fled Europe as Collapsed Narcissist second sons (unlikely to inherit property in Europe they felt they deserved but were not lawfully entitled to under the oppressive rule of Primogeniture).

Once individuals realize that toxic people oftentimes conflate terms like LOVE with trauma bonding and evolutionary success with failure, it is prudent they learn how to go Gray Rock. In order to stop the Narcissistic Cycle of Abuse from continuing, the first step in reclaiming the mind, body, spirit, and human emotions is to learn how to observe and actively reject all forms of vertical thinking that create social harm.

Winners don’t simply survive — they thrive by standing out in a crowd on their own merit. True winners know that the only person they need to compete with is the person they were a moment ago, not other humans.

By adopting the perspective that winners strive to better themselves each day — noting that no human is made better by harming or willfully neglecting others the human mind, from a neurological perspective, gains the social and emotional ability to stop feeling a pervasive need to fear or socially to compete with others.

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DISCLOSURE: The author of this post is in no way offering professional advice or psychiatric counseling services. Please contact your local authorities IMMEDIATELY if you feel you are in danger. If you suspect your partner, a loved one, co-worker, or family member has a Cluster B personality disorder, contact your local victim's advocate or domestic violence shelter for more information about how to protect your rights legally and to discuss the potential benefits or dangers of electing to go "no contact" with your abuser(s). Due to the nature of this website's content, we prefer to keep our writer's names ANONYMOUS. Please contact flyingmonkeysdenied@gmail.com directly to discuss content posted on this website, make special requests, or share your confidential story about Narcissistic Abuse with our staff writers. All correspondence will be kept strictly confidential.