Why do abusive people lie, spread rumors, and make up malicious gossip? To shame and effectively isolate targets, that’s why.
Narcissistic people are the ultimate social and emotional predators. Truly functional — rather than dysfunctional — they are vicious predators whose only intention is to win at all cost, competing in their own mind financially, physically, socially, and emotionally with every single person they project is competing actively or with intent in this life.
It’s totally normal for a person with a Cluster B personality disorder to pathologically lie, gaslight, and smear campaign. It might be absolutely dysfunctional and caustic to themselves and others, but the pattern is stereotypical.
Don’t expect to be able to avoid having to deal with their self-serving antics and shenanigans. Every narcissistic person you know who actively badmouths another person or group without that person or stereotype represented is keeping a major secret from you.
Guess what, “Narcissistic Supply Source”? If you think a narcissistic person is trustworthy because of their special interest or attachment to you, nothing could possibly be further from the truth.
The Narcissist or abusive person who connives to socially harm, damage, or invalidate the fundamental human and civil rights of others understands that what they are doing is morally wrong. They understand that lying, cheating, stealing, manipulating, and attempting to gaslight other people is wrong. They also know that lying to their friends, family members, and co-workers shows them little to no respect when and if they try recruiting Flying Monkey enablers.
Narcissistic people get off emotionally and psychologically based on the thought of getting away with something. They only show remorse for their actions when and if they are caught. There is no empathy for those traumatized by their behavior or feelings of guilt inspired by them causing other human beings social, emotional, physical, psychological, or spiritual harm.
All people with Cluster B personality disorders behave in ways that are fundamentally narcissistic. Egocentric by nature, they learn from an early age how to manipulate people by lying to them or presenting partial truths mixed with cleverly nauseating twists they make up to socially embarrass their intended target in the event of an eventual breakup.
Narcissistic people will even go so far as to make up rumors and stories about the condition of their mate or target’s mental health in order to undermine their credibility should they ever try to break the silence as a victim. Totally self-centered, they interrupt the natural process of grief after a victim has already been traumatized, demanding attention while heaping on trauma by the pile.
If you think you are being abused, that is all that matters. Your subjective opinion of having been victimized or traumatized is truly valid in spite of their attempts to minimize, blame shift, avoid taking responsibility for their action, writing revisionist history, invalidation attempts to claim you deserved the abuse or were for some reason not allowed to set healthy boundaries, their lack of respect for your emotional healing process, or outright denials.
They know the truth (that you are a good person, most likely human but still trying your best to show them respect). Narcissistic people who lack a genetic or biological ability to feel empathy choose to lie in order to bait, provoke, or socially incapacitate others because it gives them an endorphin rush.
While you are feeling the most pain, shame, and betrayal, they feel nothing but physical, emotional, and psychological pleasure. The constant competitor, they project onto their victims whatever image of them suits their needs at the moment. While self-stroking their own ego by manipulating other people’s relationships and emotions, they get off on creating artificially inspired triangulation. Then, while they “one up” by lying about one while duping another, they feel powerful and successful.
Covert bullying — whether by cyber-bullying, stalking, filing frivolous lawsuits that waste the court’s time and taxpayer resources, smear campaigning, or intimidating by overtly harassing — is the specialty of the narcissistic person and all their Flying Monkey enabling posse. Known for being situational abusers, some spend months, years, and decades abusing their preferred targets, scapegoats, and victims on the sly while publicly pretending they themselves are either perfect or have been the victims of abuse. When a kind person shows them empathy or sympathy while lying, they immediately know they have most likely found a stupid but well-meaning person to use and eventually discard or persistently abuse.
Ultimately, virtually emotionless themselves and unable to functionally experience pure joy and happiness without an undercurrent of taking sadistic pleasure in stealing, conning, lying, or conniving, emotional predators like narcissistic people or those who have Cluster B personality disorders are getting off almost exclusively because they feel almighty powerful when they con other people.
And despite what they claim, the longer the smear campaigning continues without validation of the truth, the more emotionally attached the abuser is to remain playing an active part in the lives of their victims.
It’s truly nothing more than a sign they cannot stop missing you. As rejected suitors, they must destroy you if you refuse to be hoovered when they pursue.