Malignant Narcissists use their own social insecurity as justification to bully people they consider Narcissistic Rivals. The person being targeted for abuse seldom knows why they are being scapegoated, socially targeted for destruction, or their abuser persistently cyberbullies. Why? Because above all else, narcissistic people fear losing prestige and personal power socially.
Narcissistic behavior is on a continuum of spectrum, and human beings who suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder (or “NPD” for short) tend to exhibit behavior patterns ranging from mild to wild.
According to Narcissistic Behavior Network, “Narcissism is a spectrum of behavior that is prevalent in the human condition universally. What this means is that we are all narcissistic to a degree, and the narcissistic traits can range on a continuum from 1 – 10, from what we call Healthy Narcissism (being a 1), all the way to a pathological form, called Narcissistic Personality Disorder or NPD (being a 10), with varying degrees in between.”
The source notes, “When narcissism reaches a stage called “Malignant Narcissism” the person consistently manifests at least 5 of the 9 criteria necessary to put it into the category of being a mental disorder.” And trust us… once a person has been forced to interact with a person who has a Cluster B personality type or you have been targeted for something called LOVE FRAUD by one, victims seldom ever recover.
That is not to say they do not get better. But what happens is because people with Cluster B tend to prey on the world’s most innocent, virtuous, kind-hearted, and emotionally intelligent people like they are a delicacy to be gluttonously savored, they tend to leave an emotionally starved, spiritually malnourished, carcass of a person in the place of where a bubbly personality type that used to love and believe everyone had a core nature of good in place.
“To the casual observer, telling the difference between a normal range narcissistic personality and a narcissistically disordered personality may not be very evident to begin with, because the difference is the difference between the individual’s ‘intentions’. The healthy narcissistic personality operates from a place of good will towards another person, while the unhealthy malignant disordered personality operates from a place of ill will towards another person, which naturally enough puts a chasm between them…” shares the psych website, pointing out a serious but often overlooked fundamental truth about the realities of dealing with one of them.
People who are narcissistic by nature include those with Traumatic Brain Injury, addictions issues, alcohol problems, Cluster B personality types, and more. If a body is limited in its neurological capacity to process complex emotions like empathy, the organism (as an individual human) tends to lock down intellectually and emotionally into a survival mode (of sorts).
Human children who have suffered severe trauma at early ages or who were raised by toxic parents who never once took the time to help their child learn how to process complex emotions in an intelligent way tend to become toxic thinkers. While behaving in short-sighted, egocentric, and tunnel visioned ways as a six-year-old is both normal and common, adults who behave with the same ill-tempered, attention-seeking, and arguably dictatorial facade are socially destructive both in their own lives as well as compulsively seem to delight in harming others.
The more narcissistic the person, the more likely they are to grow up and become socially and emotionally toxic. The strongest of Narcissists are called Malignant Narcissists for a reason — they truly use their Machiavellian words to infect the minds and hearts of others. Cutting them out of family life and workplace environments like one removes cancer cells surgically from a disordered body is truly the only RIGHT way to deal with them.
Because by nature, every human being — living or dead — is a social rival in the mind of a Malignant hot mess. Expect the following pattern to manifest between the MN and nearly every peer or group they associate with, noting the more exposure you have to one (personally or professionally speaking) the more likely YOU are to yourself be someday for whatever irrational reason the Narcissist dreams up to be targeted.
Narcissistic Behavior Network writes,
Where there is unhealthy narcissism, the individual manifests their behavior through a personality disorder, and therefore they are incapable of having a true reciprocal bond in any relationship. They will operate through either one-downmanship (the practice of outdoing others in a negative way), or one-upmanship (the practice of any assertion of superiority). For example, their need for ‘one-down-man-ship’ is used when they have a need to idealize someone; whereas their one-upmanship is present when they need another person as a mirroring self-object (narcissistic supply) in order to confirm their specialness for them. This does not usually last long, because all self-objects are eventually devalued once they have lost their functional one-upmanship. They are then held in contempt, and discarded after their usefulness is used up. It is nothing personal, it is how the unhealthy narcissist treats everybody; he [or] she uses, abuses, and discards, then goes on to the next victim with no remorse whatsoever.
Narcissistic Behavior Network
While many people think that because a narcissistic person tends to be consistently self-focused that they must be tremendously insecure; when it comes to dealing with a Malignant Narcissist, that’s a moot point for sure. Narcissists are grandiose in their thinking, meaning that they truly believe they are better than other people.
Malignant Narcissists, specifically, are the most grandiose of the bunch. They might constantly seem like they are insecure, petty, and jealous of others — when what they really are doing is competing and angry when and if they are not personally, financially, or physically able to “best” someone.
Being angry that they are not the most popular, the prettiest, the most well-liked, the most handsome, the wealthiest, whatever… that’s what drives the emotion in their primal mind. In order to feel insecure, one must have the intellectual capacity to legitimately CARE.
Since people with NPD lack the ability to process reality biologically based on utilizing a complete range of complex emotional processing skills, it’s actually Flying Monkeys and Enablers — or co-dependent Co-Narcissists — who spin gaslighting tales to their children telling them beautiful lies like people who bully are simply feeling insecure.
Granted, if a bully is caught and is trying to avoid consequences for their actions, they might try to work a sad sob story to someone like a therapist, family friend, schoolteacher, romantic partner, or any interested and inquiring party willing to engage with them socially and pay attention. If a person with NPD tries telling you they felt insecure as a justification for bullying, smear campaigning, lying about another person, or hitting / hurting, understand they have targeted YOU for manipulation.
You see, the more malignant the personality type, the more likely they are to be very good at sizing people up. The ultimate con men and con women, if they detect telling a lie about feeling insecure to make someone feel sorry for them will get them out of a social jam, they will tell it.
Competing socially and being angry they lost or are not being paid enough attention to by friends, family, clientele, the general public, the media, whoever is simply NOT the same thing as feeling a complex emotion like jealousy. It’s rooted in part in envy — something like jealousy, but the raw drive propelling their stereotypical fury seems to be based on contempt more than actual insecurity.
For that reason alone, resist the urge to feel sorry for them or to offer children (especially) bad intel about how to deal with a narcissistic person. If someone enjoys being mean, they are a SADIST… not someone who with loving moral support can learn to improve their life, personality, character, or change nature.
If this concept does not make sense to you, more reading on Narcissistic Rivalry is suggested. Narcissistic Abuse is foolish to overlook and people who manufacture pain and chaos for other human beings in social or situational abuse settings should never be enabled, supported, or tolerated.